I sometimes have to remind myself that God wants to use me; who I am, as I am, right now. It’s easy to write ourselves off and to think we’re not ready yet but God is looking for people who are ready and waiting; first to hear his word and then to obey it. He knew what he was doing when he knit us together in our mother’s womb – he wants to use us as we are.
I love the story of Rabbi Zusya who lived in the 1700’s. He said ‘When I get to the heavenly court, God will not ask me ‘Why weren’t you Moses?’ Rather he will ask me ‘Why were you not Zusya?’ It is so easy to compare ourselves and it can really throw us off track and be discouraging. I can put it no better than Paul in his letter to the Galatians:
‘Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given and then sink yourself into that. Don’t be impressed with yourself. Don’t compare yourself to others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life’ (Gal 6:4-5 The Message).
Whenever I hear talks about the five-fold ministries I think well I don’t think I’m any of those! But recently I came across a useful tool on the internet and some different words which have really opened up the different gifts to me. You can take the test here: http://www.fivefoldministrytest.com/
The five gifts are re-described as:
1. Light Giver (Teacher)
2. Story Teller (Evangelist)
3. Heart Revealer (Prophet)
4. Soul Healer (Pastor)
5. Dream Awakener (Apostle)
If you go to this website there are some links to a fuller explanation of each of the gifts: http://jrwoodward.net/equippers/
Now, I would not say that I am an evangelist particularly but a story teller, yes I can be that. Am I qualified to be a teacher? I’m not sure, but a light giver? Yes I can do that. I wonder if our negative associations with these words challenge us to really see ourselves as flourishing in some of these areas. It is easy to be intimidated by labels but let’s go after these gifts, let’s find out who God has made us to be and lets be ourselves to the fullest degree that we can be on this earth. After all:
‘Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others’ (Marianne Williamson).
EDIT: A fuller exploration of this features in my book; Circles: Nurture and Grow Your Creative Gift. You can find it in my Etsy shop here.
elisabeth pike 